THE FIXER-UPPERS
CABLE TV EXECUTIVE: A weekly show about an attractive mother and daughter who renovate old homes? Why should our network pick this up. Ladies, the market is full of shows about house renovations.
ERICA: Well, sir, what makes our show different is that not only is the real estate being renovated – your stars, us, have undergone some work!
CATHY: What my daughter means is that we used to be Ed Caplan and his father Charlie- we were normal guys in the construction business.
EXECUTIVE: What the fuck? You’re trannies? That’s a hell of a gimmick.
ERICA: Trust us, buddy, it’s no gimmick. Underneath our panties is one hell of a tool. After flunking out of college, I worked as a drag queen performer downtown, and I got good at hiding my junk and passing as a real girl. I enjoyed teasing and taunting the guys who I turned on.
CATHY: And I saw what she was doing, and it intrigued me. I dared her to make me over as a gorgeous blonde like her. The hormones we ended up both taking really gave us some sick curves and some dirty fantasies…
ERICA: Yea, dirty, sexy, fantasies. You mean, like offering a high powered TV suit the chance to have two T-girls spend the weekend with him, sucking his cock and letting him fuck them in the ass, Momma dearest?
CATHY: That’s just one of several ideas I had. And you can buy the rest for – let’s say – ordering 26 episodes from our production company.
EXECUTIVE: You drive a HARD bargain, gals, but… I’m sold! Now, STRIP!